Friday, December 15, 2006

She-Wolf of London

She-Wolf of London (1946)

Directed by: Jean Yarbrough
Written by: George Bricker
Starring: June Lockhart, Sara Haden, Jan Wiley, Don Porter, Eily Malyon, Lloyd Corrigan, Dennis Hoey, Martin Kosleck, Frederick Worlock

I have no idea why I bothered rewatching this. Maybe with the hopes that it would have improved with age. Alas, it's still as dull and unsatisfying as ever.

A young woman believes that she's the werewolf resposnsible for all the murders in the park near where she lives. Is it the dreaded Allenby curse come back to haunt her? Or is her step-aunt trying to drive her insane so that she can get her money? Who knows? Who cares.

It's all build up with a very disappointing climax, all very reminiscent of those weird House Movies that were so popular back then.

The plot is painstakingly boring, the writing is painstakingly dull, the characters are painstakingly two-dimensional.

The production values aren't even that great, and the crew was apparently kind of unproffesional (the shadow of the boom can be seen clearly in one of the scenes). The atmosphere wasn't even that great. Sure, there were some nice scenes in the dark and foggy park, but none too many.

There wasn't even any drama, apart from the two girls who are both sort of hanging around with the same man. One of them isn't even interested in him at all, though, so that quickly goes out the window.

My verdict is that it's just a complete and total waste of time, and I've already spent two hourse of my life watching it. Thank God it's short. Could be worthy of a remake, provided that the characters were made more interesting, the ending was modified, and considerable amounts of violence, gore and sex were added (though that would probably cancel out the interesting character thing), which they inevitably would be. The audience would be puking with boredom otherwise. At least give them something decent to puke about. In other words, I want to see the insides of people, dammit! None of the actors in the movie had very appealing outsides, so it stands to reason that their outsides should be removed.

I am immortaizing this on the internet (immortal my ass, but it should be close enough) so that I can avoid this movie like the plague in future. When I think to myself "Hey, I should watch She-Wolf of London again. Maybe it's gotten better!", I will then remember that it sucked and I will instead watch The Matrix again, for lack of anything else. It's always there for me. I love you, Matrix. You are my eternal back-up plan.

END COMMUNICATION

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