Evan Almighty

Evan Almighty (2007)

Directed by: Tom Shadyac
Written by: Steve Oedekerk, based on Noah's Ark, by God
Starring: Steve Carell, Morgan Freeman, Lauren Graham, Johnny Simmons, Graham Phillips, Jimmy Bennett, John Goodman, Wanda Sykes, John Michael Higgins, Jonah Hill, Molly Shannon

Sequel to Bruce Almighty sort of goes in a more family friendly direction. Meaning no Jim Carey style antics (unfortunately. As much as those antics get on my nerves, they're a lot more entertaining than the nonexistant antics in this movie).

God comes down from his penthouse in the sky and tells Steve Carell to build an ark. Steve Carell says no. God makes him do it (he made me do it!) by holding his family hostage. Bruce Willis, reprising his role as John McLane (or McClane or however we're spelling that), must come in and, I don't know, stop somebody from doing something.

I'm joking, that would have been silly. He makes him do it by causing him to grow a beard. So Steve Carell builds an ark, which apparently is a great father-son bonding activity.

It's basically just an exact retelling of the Noah story, not even jazzed up that much. At least Bruce went for a sort of new story, and made fun of the whole God thing.

This movie was just so nice. Okay, there was some funny stuff in it. I won't deny that. And I sort of like Steve Carell, but... it wasn't very edgy.

And apparently the Noah thing has less to do with actually building the damn ark than wearing a robe and having a great big bushy beard.

Anyway, in the end, the flood doesn't really do a hell of a lot. It doesn't kill everybody (which it really should have) or anybody for that matter. Damn. There was a lot of property damage, but very few human casualties. Which makes me wonder. Why build the damn ark at all? All buddy had to do was stand on his roof and he would have been okay. Why fill the thing with animals?

It makes no sense to me. It's all about believing in God and crap like that, which bugs me a bit. If God told me to build an ark, I... probably wouldn't do it. If Morgan Freeman told me to, I probably would, though. I mean... he's Morgan Freeman. Come on.

And I love his comfy white God pajamas. I wish I had some of those (mind you, as I am not God despite my best efforts, I doubt I could pull it off. I'd just be really comfy).

END COMMUNICATION