Creepshow 3

Creepshow III (2006)

Directed by: Ana Clavell & James Glenn Dudelson
Written by: Ana Clavell; Alex Ugelow; Pablo C. Pappano; James Glenn Dudelson; Scott Frazelle
Starring: Emmett McGuire, Stephanie Pettee, A.J. Bowen, Camille Lacey, Kris Allen, Michael Madrid, Magi Avila, Ben Pronsky, Ryan Carty, Bo Kresic, Greg McDougall, Elwood Carlisle, Roy Abramsohn, Cara Cameron, Elina Madison, Akil Wingate, Susan Schramm, Bunny Gibson, Matt Fromm

Another Creepshow picture, this one doesn't seem to have anything to do with Stephen King or George Romero (speaking of whom, I watched the trailer for his new movie online the other day - Cloverfield much? But anyway...).

Part 1 is about an evil/magic TV remote which turns an obnoxious teenage girl into a pus dripping monster and then a white rabbit. Part 2 is about an evil/magic radio which tells a security guard to rob a pimp or something. Part 3 is about a call girl who murders her clients and then runs into a vampire. Part 4 is about a nerdy professor who invites his former students to meet his young fiancé - they discover that she is in fact a robot and hack her up looking for the 'off' switch. Only then do they realize she is in fact a mail-order bride with short term memory loss or something. Part 5 is about a man who gives a dirty hot dog to a homeless person, killing him (cos, you know, if you eat anything that touched the ground, it'll kill you instantly). Then the homeless guy comes back to get revenge or something.

While the first two Creepshow movies were kind of cheap and dumb, this one seemed to be totally incompetent. It was badly directed, edited, acted, shot and written, so much so that some parts of it didn't even make sense. I gather it was made for TV or something, so that has a bit to do with it, but I've made better movies, really.

That being said, the way they sort of tied the stories together was kind of cool. All the segments appear to be set in the same Universe, and there's a bit of crossover. A little sloppy maybe, but an interesting idea.

Also, I don't know if the stories were getting better or my brain was getting dumber, but the last couple of parts were mildly amusing. The first two were kind of awful, almost unbearably bad, but they got a little bit better as they went on.

I don't know. Not really a very good movie at all, not really a worthy sequel to the other ones and not something I would recommend watching voluntarily, but, suppose you just happened to be watching it, say it was on TV and you couldn't change the channel (I'm not sure where I'm going with this...), um, I guess if you can make it to the second half without killing yourself... right? Sure.

My brain doesn't work. Hey!

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