The Warriors

The Warriors (1979)

Ranking: Meh
Extremely Trashy

That movie where a gang from Coney Island gets framed for the assassination of a big time gang leader (Roger Hill) and must evade the other gangs which are out to get them long enough to return home.

This movie is totally precious. I mean, it seems like the only thing you really need to do to start a gang is get a bunch of people to wear the same dorky costumes (like in Batman! You know how like in the movies all the henchmen of any particular villain dress the same. It's funny) and then come up with a cute name. Gangs in this movie include: The Warriors (duh), The Rogues, The Baseball Furies (these guys all wore Yankee pinstripes and beat the shit out of people with baseball bats. Yeah!), The Orphans, The Lizzies, and the Wu-Tang Clan.

I always wanted to start up my own gang and walk around busting heads and windshields with golf clubs. That was honest to God one of my childhood dreams. I think this movie finally killed that aspiration, which is possibly for the better. This movie and Clockwork Orange. The guys just look like such dorks. All they needed were matching mullets and the look would be complete (I'm pretty sure at least one of them had a mullet...).

Anyway, despite the fact that it was majorly dorky and the villain was really fucking annoying (I could not wait for somebody, preferably the space man with the big sunglasses, to pop a cap in that guy's ass), this movie was sort of entertaining and soothingly predictable.

It was also packed with violence - although most of it was nonlethal, and the fight scenes weren't that well choreographed - and the main guy was kind of good looking, so it's got that going for it.

I'm pretty much ambivalent towards the whole thing though so whatever.

END

Directed by: Walter Hill. Written by: Walter Hill and David Shaber based on the novel by Sol Yurick. Starring: Michael Beck, James Remar, Dorsey Wright, Brian Tyler, David Harris, Tom McKitterick, Marcelino Sánchez, Terry Michos, Deborah Van Valkenburgh.